The Drabblecast Forums

L0rdEntr0py wrote:

strawman wrote:Welcome to the House of Groans.
Do you go by Lord?

I'll accept the title if there's a sprawling, crumbling castle in it for me.

Lord, won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz....

...actually I'd settle for a 6 pack of craft beer and big yummy pretzel.

I saw Gloria's glorious guns the other day. They were big, but not so big they didn't fit in her hands. I think one was a 9mm.

MadeintheDark wrote:

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70's left commune, real job 80's self-absorbed 90's genetic seeding seven kids Now handmade hummus am I a hippie still?

inspired by @SpinDaddy 's use of the word "hippie"

Woot! I inspired something positive... I think!

unreliable narrator wrote:Sunlight crept into my room on golden sandaled feet and I sniffed audibly. "Did you tread dogshit into the house again?"

Haha, I can totally picture somebody's hippie mom yelling this at them.

This new species will bare my name," said Dr. John Opossum. "Why can't we name it after me?" asked Dr. Cornelius Shitrat. (There. That one isn't technically a pun. Happy?) OMG Dad! You ran over a shitrat back there! Junior! Get away from that thing! Aw Mom, its just a Shitrat pretending it's dead. ...

"Look Mom why is this a big deal? I just ignited the man's passion!"
"You set him on fire by using a blowtorch on his penis!"

I tried to lure the viking into drowning, but he was too buoyant. You can lead a Norse to water, but you can't make him sink. I blasted out a loud HA! at this one! Excellant! As far as puns, I'm that guy that loves puns whether you meant the pun or not. I'll always laugh. I like to think its becaus...

I finally got to listen to it. Everything sounded fine and dandy to me! Loved the story btw. Made me think I need a sugar girl that melts in your mouth and not in your hands... does it count as canibalism if shes sugar? Er... I mean that this was a fabulous coming of age story and I enjoyed every mi...

Algernon Sydney is Dead wrote:The creature was hideous & pale with an unblinking brown eye. It was so large, I couldn't miss. I kicked the shit out of it.

"Officer, you see these boots? They are called 'shit-kickers'. They were made for this type of thing. Just try them on!"

Culhwch wrote:Her: a pretty, blonde virgin; Him: a crazed cult leader. When they met she fell in love. When they parted she fell in lava.

This one made me yell "ha!"

I like it! Good job!

Algernon Sydney is Dead wrote:

tobadzistsini wrote:Concerned about the dearth of genetic diversity in utahraptors, John Hammond issued an amber alert for Jurassic Park.

They found a bit of dinosaur DNA in Amber. That lying bitch! I KNEW she was cheating on me.

Archaeologists love to bone!

This one made me laugh, good job!

Algernon Sydney is Dead wrote:The dragon ate me but did not destroy my amulet of protection. Still, after days of battling in intestines, I was pooped.

Before now, I never knew what it was like to snarf coffee. Damn you... some things i just didn't want to know.

But awesome!! Loved it!

Algernon Sydney is Dead wrote: But it would be horrifyingly cool to hear Norm's twist on Martin.

Seconded because one time the moon hit my eye.

Algernon Sydney is Dead wrote:

Spindaddy wrote:Dad always said if I played with it too much I'd go blind. Damn it! Why hadn't I believed him about that damn laser pointer?

You have a "prostrate massager" with a built-in laser pointer!?
(Quick, get your NEA grant before someone else clinches this idea.)

Clenches... on the idea?

Dad always said if I played with it too much I'd go blind. Damn it! Why hadn't I believed him about that damn laser pointer?

Algernon Sydney is Dead wrote:

Spindaddy wrote:Centauritas?

I am so stealing that.

A beautiful Centaurita & I
were horsing around.
When she told me, "'Neigh' means 'no'!"
and trampled me into the ground.

Haha Thats awesome! And steal away! It's all good!

All my friends knew my Pops had named me after the biggest bad ass he had known. I left out the detail Crazy Joe was a donkey.

Mustang Sally sounded like a real cool chick, until I found out what a centaur smells like. Blind dates can be real tough. :lol: Plus, I don't think Centaurs come in "Mares" :shock: Centauras? Centauritas? Why wouldn't they come in Mares? I mean, sure horses being a different species and all.... wa...

"Come and get it" she said, a wry smile playing on her lips. He came. She gave it to him. The orgasm killer had struck again. HAHA! Loved this one! So happy since I found that cheese graters make great back scratchers. Wait, mom's calling me to dinner. O boy! Lasagna! This one made me shudder and g...

Mary gasped and Steve blushed. There in Maria's open purse lay a shriveled bloody mass. "See? His balls are in my purse."