Mixer

100 word stories. Post all you like, maybe we'll dip in and use yours?
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Scattercat
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Mixer

Post by Scattercat » Fri Dec 02, 2011 2:33 am

God was at the party, which was unexpected. The invitation had been more aspirational than anything else. A wouldn't-it-be-cool-if idea hatched between the vodka and the tequila. No one thought they'd even get past His screeners. But now there He was, pursing His lips and considering the impressive-for-a-college-kid-but-come-on-it's-God selection at the wet bar. Nora thought she should introduce herself. She had questions. She had some pretty serious questions, actually. But surely He knew that already? She adjusted her bra strap and bit her lip. It was a once-in-a-lifetime chance.

The empty space around God didn't fill up all night.

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munsi
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Re: Mixer

Post by munsi » Fri Dec 02, 2011 9:21 am

entertaining story, and AMAZING first line. love it!

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ROU Killing Time
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Re: Mixer

Post by ROU Killing Time » Sat Dec 03, 2011 8:27 pm

This was fun, and you packed quite a lot of twists, turns, and pictures into 100 words, (excellllennnt use of the "hyphenated-words-count-as-a-single-word" clause, btw... ;-)

I particularly liked Nora's reaction, the adjustment of her bra-strap and the biting of the lip.

As I say, very nice picture-drawing.

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tbaker2500
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Re: Mixer

Post by tbaker2500 » Tue Dec 06, 2011 2:14 am

You never know about that Dark Matter, though.
You're my quasi-ichthian angel, you're my half-amphibian queen...

The Dribblecast, we don't care if you sound like an idiot.

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Scattercat
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Re: Mixer

Post by Scattercat » Wed Dec 07, 2011 6:44 am

AMAZING first line
Thanks. :-) This one was definitely all about the opener. It pretty much built organically from there.
excellllennnt use of the "hyphenated-words-count-as-a-single-word" clause, btw...
I'd feel guilty if I hadn't made it serve double-duty by using it as a characterization thing.

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ROU Killing Time
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Re: Mixer

Post by ROU Killing Time » Wed Dec 07, 2011 7:06 am

Scattercat wrote:
AMAZING first line
Thanks. :-) This one was definitely all about the opener. It pretty much built organically from there.
excellllennnt use of the "hyphenated-words-count-as-a-single-word" clause, btw...
I'd feel guilty if I hadn't made it serve double-duty by using it as a characterization thing.
No guilt at all, I'd say. It was clever.

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strawman
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Re: Mixer

Post by strawman » Wed Dec 07, 2011 1:41 pm

Scattercat wrote: impressive-for-a-college-kid-but-come-on-it's-God
Shouldn't this be
" impressive-for-a-college-kid-but-,-come-on-,-it's-God "?

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Scattercat
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Re: Mixer

Post by Scattercat » Fri Dec 09, 2011 8:43 am

No.

The commas would go in front of the hyphens. :-P

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bell
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Re: Mixer

Post by bell » Wed Dec 21, 2011 2:58 pm

Yeah, that polyhyphenation felt organic to the piece, and it really did pack a wallop.

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mrsmica
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Re: Mixer

Post by mrsmica » Thu Dec 22, 2011 6:07 pm

Dark Matter. I'll remember that one if I ever see God at a party :D

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