The Lizard With a Fat Tongue

100 word stories. Post all you like, maybe we'll dip in and use yours?
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admiralsunshine
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The Lizard With a Fat Tongue

Postby admiralsunshine » Tue Mar 13, 2012 4:28 pm

The reptile stood on the deck of the ship and looked at the stars. He was clad in a shipsuit, same as his shipmates. They were all human, however. He stood as tall as them, and upright in the same fashion.

His kind was similar to theirs in almost every way, except the scales, slitted eyes, gills, and internal reproductive organs.

One of the crewmen shouted, "Hey Thhhhh! Get back to wiping the glass!"

His name isn't "Thhhhh." It's "Sssssss." He had been hatched with a lisp, a cruel fate for one whose species can only produce the "S" sound.
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strawman
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Re: The Lizard With a Fat Tongue

Postby strawman » Tue Mar 13, 2012 7:51 pm

My Fair Lady, with snakes. :)
Never judge anyone until you have biopsied their brain.

"Be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle."
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Spoiler:
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admiralsunshine
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Re: The Lizard With a Fat Tongue

Postby admiralsunshine » Wed Mar 14, 2012 4:59 pm

strawman wrote:My Fair Lady, with snakes. :)

Can't say I'm familiar, but it sounds classy and educated so thanks! :P
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Christi
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Re: The Lizard With a Fat Tongue

Postby Christi » Wed Mar 14, 2012 7:05 pm

Just you wait 'Eenry 'Iggins, just you wait,,,you'll be sorry but your tears will be too late...

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strawman
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Re: The Lizard With a Fat Tongue

Postby strawman » Wed Mar 14, 2012 7:31 pm

admiralsunshine wrote:
strawman wrote:My Fair Lady, with snakes. :)

Can't say I'm familiar, but it sounds classy and educated so thanks! :P


Thank you, Christi.
In the alternative to the Broadway version: Pygmalion with Snakes.
No?
A story about a worm-class woman who could join the anaconda-class if the confirmed bachelor speech professor can get her to hiss "the rain in Spain is mainly in the plain".

I know. Sounds strange.

In the original Greek version, by Ovid, a gay sculptor falls in love with the ivory statue he has made, and the guy becomes straight :shock:by kissing and feeling up the statue, which turns into a real woman. They marry and have children. In the Italian remake, this statue is a puppet called Pinnochio. :x

The Broadway version had songs by Rogers & Hammerstein. Coincidentally, Hammerstein means "Hammer stone", or sculptor :o . He was not gay :( . But then, neither was Pygmalion after romancing the stone :) (yet another adaptation).

Apparently, if you've seen one, you've seen 'em all.
I don't know about classy, but at DC, educated you will certainly be.
Never judge anyone until you have biopsied their brain.

"Be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle."
Known Some Call Is Air Am
Spoiler:
Non sum qualis eram = "I am not who I will be"

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admiralsunshine
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Re: The Lizard With a Fat Tongue

Postby admiralsunshine » Wed Mar 14, 2012 8:32 pm

Yeah I think I'm gonna recant that "classy." And that's definitely not the Pinocchio I remember O_O
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Christi
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Re: The Lizard With a Fat Tongue

Postby Christi » Thu Mar 15, 2012 9:56 am

I think they redid Ovid’s story in the form of “Mannequin” He was a shop assistant that fell in love with a Mannequin that magically came to life, she was a beautiful women sent to our time, by the gods of her time to find love and happiness.

Another modern version would be Pretty Women. All he needed to do was get the hooker out of her, and then, he could love her.
Never mind his deficiencies…I mean he had to hire her so that he could have company!

In my estimation, Eliza Doolittle was more interesting with her “speech impediment”. (That said its one of my favorite classics!)
I reckon SSSsss should embrace his lisp, it theparates him for the retht.

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admiralsunshine
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Re: The Lizard With a Fat Tongue

Postby admiralsunshine » Thu Mar 15, 2012 2:44 pm

Christi wrote:I reckon SSSsss should embrace his lisp, it theparates him for the retht.


Hehe, if you have free time, you should check out craigs-lisp.com it's hilarious. It's a total conversion of craigs-list and replaces every "s" with a "th." If you have stuff up there, you can even see your own posts in lithp. My personal favorite page on it is "Avoiding Thcamth and Fraudth"

And if I remember pretty woman correctly, that guy was just looking for a tour guide...hmmm maybe my mistake



Exampleth of Thcamth

1. Thomeone claimth that craigslisp will guarantee a tranthaction, thertify a buyer/theller, OR claimth that craigslisp will handle or provide protection for a payment.

* Thethe claimth are fraudulent, ath craigslisp doeth not have any role in any tranthaction.

* Thcammer will often thend an offithial looking email that appearth to come from craigslisp, offering a guarantee, thertifying a theller, providing payment thervitheth -- all thuch emailth are faketh!
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