Playing for Real

[mynameisinvalid]

The conductor appeared from offstage as the orchestra’s tuning trickled to a halt.

Three clicks of the baton signaled for silence and the orchestra froze, all eyes forward. The baton dropped into rhythm, but only a single violin sang out into the concert hall.

“Crap,” said the waiting sniper, and fired.

Gasps of horror rippled through the audience as the player slumped over onto his music stand, violin clattering to the floor, dripping blood.

The three clicks of the baton rang out again. As the conductor raised his hands to begin, his words echoed through the shocked hall.

“Simon says.”

[mynameisinvalid]

Ok, decided the sniper should say "bingo" instead. And it should be "blood dripping" rather than "dripping blood."

[strawman]

That doesn't clarify it much.
Can't figure the connection between Bingo, sniper and orchestra. Looked around for a pun or double-entendre, and came up empty. Change some more words? Can we buy a vowel?

[uncre8d1]

Unless I'm missing something, which is precedented and entirely possible, I think this one falls under the 'pure weird' heading of Drabblecastery rather than in the more common headings of 'weird/funny' and 'weird/gross.' Entertaining without being noticeably amusing or sad or unnerving - not a bad thing. Helps me remember that the mind can be occupied for the sake of occupation. In a sense, it's escapism in its most pristine form. Or I might be an idiot. Almost definitely one of those two.

[strawman]

Unless I'm missing something, which is precedented and entirely possible, I think this one falls under the 'pure weird' heading of Drabblecastery rather than in the more common headings of 'weird/funny' and 'weird/gross.' Entertaining without being noticeably amusing or sad or unnerving - not a bad thing. Helps me remember that the mind can be occupied for the sake of occupation. In a sense, it's escapism in its most pristine form. Or I might be an idiot. Almost definitely one of those two.

Wow! That's almost word for word the report I wrote on The Sound and the Fury in English 101.
As I recall, my teacher favored the 'idiot' theory.

[mynameisinvalid]

Ok, I guess I should cut the sniper's line altogether. I'd wanted to have two snipers conversing - maybe they'd make a bet on the concert - but ran out of words. Any suggestions to replace lost words?

[Algernon Sydney is Dead]

Ah, I finally figured out the story. Fine idea but it has too many characters and too many POV's for 100 words. You must cut something so that the remaining bits convey the key point in a clear way.

Here's my humble, drunken, edit:

Doctor Tsybukin, the famous composer and performance artist, strolled to the podium.

With three clicks of his baton, he signaled for silence and the orchestra froze, all eyes forward. The baton dropped into rhythm, but only a single accordion blared into the concert hall.

From the rafters, a shot rang out. It was quickly followed by screams of horror as the accordionist slumped over his music stand. The first-string cellist quietly brushed bits of skull off her lap.

Doctor Tsybukin clicked his baton again. But this time, when he raised his hands to begin, he said, quite clearly, “Simon says.”

[strawman]

Strawman thinks there's apparently something important about Simon Says that he is missing.

In such cases, he usually looks to Wikipedia for clarification. However, he feels awkward researching Simon Says on Wikipedia.

[Algernon Sydney is Dead]

Simon says, "Research the #&*$@ phrase!"

[uncre8d1]

But did the conductor actually proceed to say anything? In my experience, this is a crucial next step in playing 'Simon Says.'

[strawman]

It's okay to research the meaning of italian phrases in Ezra Pound. But the rules of Simon Says?
Are the rules the same as they were when I last played, early in the last century? I keep getting the question 'May I?' But wasn't the "Simon says" part supposed to come at the beginning?

Tantalizing.

And what about "Simon says, jump up. Come down."

[Algernon Sydney is Dead]

♫ Trollin' trollin', trollin'...

[PureChance]

Hmm it clicked for me first time though, although I agree 'Bingo' would probably be better than 'Crap'. I enjoyed it