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Life is a Joke

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 4:06 pm
by Regravity
In my ear I hear a click. It is the hammer of a revolver I have pointed at my head as I cock the pistol one last time. The frustrations of daily life must have got to me I guess. Finally, I contemplate the end.

My mind wanders as life events flash before me, I stand ready to accept my fate. I pull back on the trigger, the cylinder of the gun rotates once and a deep red floods my vision.

As I lay on the floor a word in black floats in front of my eyes, mocking me.

Bang.

Re: Life is a Joke

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 4:25 pm
by strawman
Welcome aboard, Regravity!

Re: Life is a Joke

Posted: Mon Jul 01, 2013 4:42 pm
by Varda
Yeah, that's what you get when you buy guns branded "ACME" in a back alley from people named Will E. Coyote.

Welcome to the forums! :)

Re: Life is a Joke

Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 4:53 am
by Regravity
Thanks! Glad to be aboard!

I've been listening to Drabblecast for years and lurked around the forums (I've been registered for a while).

Re: Life is a Joke

Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 12:12 pm
by PhineasQP
Nice one! This is a lot funnier than what happened to Jon-Erik Hexum.

Re: Life is a Joke

Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 6:03 pm
by ROU Killing Time
"You are a fluke of the universe. You have no right to be here, and whether you can hear it or not the universe is laughing behind your back."

Deteriorata

Re: Life is a Joke

Posted: Tue Jul 02, 2013 7:57 pm
by strawman
The Universe is God's evil twin.

Re: Life is a Joke

Posted: Wed Jul 03, 2013 12:26 am
by ROU Killing Time
strawman wrote:The Universe is God's evil twin.
"And so, make peace with your God, whatever you conceive Him to be; hairy thunderer; or cosmic muffin. For all it's hopes, dreams, promises, and urban renewal the world continues to deteriorate. Give up."

(Apparently the author of Desirata loved the parody and considered it to be a superior bit of poetry.)

Re: Life is a Joke

Posted: Wed Jul 10, 2013 7:15 pm
by chemistryguy
ROU Killing Time wrote:
strawman wrote:The Universe is God's evil twin.
"And so, make peace with your God, whatever you conceive Him to be; hairy thunderer; or cosmic muffin. For all it's hopes, dreams, promises, and urban renewal the world continues to deteriorate. Give up."

(Apparently the author of Desirata loved the parody and considered it to be a superior bit of poetry.)
God is a comedian, playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.
-Voltaire

God is a short order cook with a propensity to spit into every third burger.
-chemistryguy

Re: Life is a Joke

Posted: Wed Jul 10, 2013 10:51 pm
by DoctorBanzai
Good one. I enjoyed this. Thank you for posting.

Re: Life is a Joke

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2013 12:48 pm
by secretnude
I agree, I see but I have no gun, and a slow death by poison is no fun!

I have been thinking about making my exit soon by the light of a full moon or at high noon like a crazy loon but I keep holding back since I sorely lack initiative even in this matter of spilling out my gray matter on the floor behind a closed door.

Therefore, even if I feel really sore and life is a giant bore I try to even the score by writing out all I can before everything finally does turn south.

Re: Life is a Joke

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2013 3:00 pm
by Farseeker
We live on a dead end street with only one connection, which is one-way (from our street, turning left) . Whenever anyone visiting our house for the first time leaves, we advise them on how to return to the parallel main street that is one block away to the right.

"Remember: Two wrongs don't make a right. But three lefts do."

Re: Life is a Joke

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2013 3:16 pm
by strawman
:D
Farseeker wrote:We live on a dead end street with only one connection, which is one-way (from our street, turning left) . Whenever anyone visiting our house for the first time leaves, we advise them on how to return to the parallel main street that is one block away to the right.

"Remember: Two wrongs don't make a right. But three lefts do."