Something Funny Walks This Way

100 word stories. Post all you like, maybe we'll dip in and use yours?
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Hellcat
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Something Funny Walks This Way

Post by Hellcat » Thu Jul 17, 2014 2:24 pm

Sherbet the burlesque clown ran for his life, chased by two blurry figures cackling in the night. There was little hope for escape, as his opaque make-up streams down his face onto the pavement leaving a steady white trail behind him.

Suddenly the shadows become solid and bore down on his throat and wrists. One of them stops and furiously spits out Sherbet's hot blood. "Adrian, don't ingest its blood!" but it was too late for his friend. His nose blooms red and spherical, his hair frizzes bright orange whilst his feet rupture his leather shoes. He had become...a Were-Clown.
"And then it rained cake." (Jingo, Terry Pratchett)

Blog: http://then-it-rained-drabbles.tumblr.com/

My Illustrations : http://www.flickr.com/photos/lady-cerridwen/"

My fan art:
mystic2u.deviantart.com

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JoshPeters
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Re: Something Funny Walks This Way

Post by JoshPeters » Fri Aug 01, 2014 12:06 am

I like it but the story flips between past and present tense.

Beware of clowns.

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Hellcat
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Re: Something Funny Walks This Way

Post by Hellcat » Sat Aug 23, 2014 10:40 pm

Do you think should I make the beginning more present to make it flow better? Or make it all in the past?
"And then it rained cake." (Jingo, Terry Pratchett)

Blog: http://then-it-rained-drabbles.tumblr.com/

My Illustrations : http://www.flickr.com/photos/lady-cerridwen/"

My fan art:
mystic2u.deviantart.com

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JoshPeters
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Re: Something Funny Walks This Way

Post by JoshPeters » Tue Aug 26, 2014 10:17 pm

It could work either way but it would flow best if you went with one or the other.

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strawman
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Re: Something Funny Walks This Way

Post by strawman » Wed Aug 27, 2014 8:57 am

Isn't the beginning usually in the past?
Never judge anyone until you have biopsied their brain.

"Be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle."
Known Some Call Is Air Am
Spoiler:
Non sum qualis eram = "I am not who I will be"

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JoshPeters
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Re: Something Funny Walks This Way

Post by JoshPeters » Wed Aug 27, 2014 5:39 pm

Only when you get to the future.

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