God I hate people. 'Swhy I gotta hide at the bottom of this ink-squirtin' ocean! Can't get any peace, I wish a million of those little carcass eaters would just finish me off—for good. I'd do it myself but I don't even have the energy. I'll just lie here in these murky depths forever.
. . . I can't believe she left me. What more did the woman want? I am literally
Aw, (sigh). Ok! I heard you, “buncha nerve gas.” I can't get up. Can't everyone hold their breath until it blows away? I am SUPER depressed right now.
some days, I just don't feel like saving people. get off my back. also I have fun making up swear words
I want to add a footnote to this because I meant to say something before: a super hero in a white suit called Bipolar Bear seems the most obvious and choicest. .erm, choice, but I think that joke is exceptionally funny and because I didn't think of it myself I dare not use it.
Many on the forum have asked me, so here's my answer: a spoonful of lighter fluid. And you'll need to wash it out really well when you're done.