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Post vaguely tech related creepy limericks. I will start.

Posted: Sun Jan 11, 2015 9:48 pm
by Deatblossom
There once was a young lad on my feed
Who cracked more with each post that he keyed
Till he went quite insane,
And "unfriended" his brain
Now he howls at his shrink to be freed
---
A young woman who loved social media
Lost a fight on ye olde Wikipedia
Tracked her nemesis down
Then she dished in his crown
With an old abridged encyclopedia
---
A man holding his phone in the gloom
Stood and knocked down his chair with a BOOM
The last text he did see
Was a message from me:
"You're not the only one in the room"
---
An old Aunt yelled at one of her apps
As the bridge beneath her did collapse
"You damned bitch Siri!"
"Why do this to me?"
"Even though I removed Google Maps?"

Siri then did reply as they fell:
"I found you the best path straight to Hell."
"Kiss your ass goodbye"
"And just FYI"
"I'm deleting your email as well."
---
A programmer began turning green
Due to things appearing on his screen
Not from an AI
Or NSA spy
But the ghost that's within his machine
---
A wicked death car, demon possessed
Has the pedestrians very stressed
It has raised the bar
For the self driving car
The Google engineers are impressed

I know that you are probably wishin'
That this demon car was superstition
But the dmv knows
That the paperwork shows
It's registered "zero emission"

Though it suffers both scratches and dents
From murdering both ladies and gents
It keeps itself pristine
Yes its name is Christine
And its presence is lowering rents

Re: Post vaguely tech related creepy limericks. I will star

Posted: Sun Jan 11, 2015 11:33 pm
by Algernon Sydney is Dead
There's some chuckle-worthy 'licks in there.
Welcome aboard!

Re: Post vaguely tech related creepy limericks. I will star

Posted: Mon Jan 12, 2015 2:33 am
by Deatblossom
Thanks. The podcast makes you want to write something and limericks are about all I can do at the moment.

Re: Post vaguely tech related creepy limericks. I will star

Posted: Mon Jan 12, 2015 10:35 am
by strawman
Very good. Limericks are inherently strange.

If you want to expand, it might be fun to try a 5 paragraph story consisting of each limerick line as a paragraph heading, followed by some merry tangent it inspires.

What often works for me is to use Google Translate to convert it to another language, then retranslate it back to English:

A young woman who loved to social media
Lost a fight in Ye Olde Wikipedia
Tracked down his nemesis
Then partitioned in its crown
With an old abbreviated encyclopedia

(Well, sometimes it's funny.)

Re: Post vaguely tech related creepy limericks. I will star

Posted: Mon Jan 12, 2015 7:09 pm
by Deatblossom
I like taking old limericks and changing the last rhyming word. It drives people crazy. It is a tiny bit of banal wickedness. It is the kind of "evil" that is inspired by Phil, The prince of insufficient light. http://search.dilbert.com/comic/Phil%20 ... nt%20Light

There once was a man from Belfast
Whose balls were made of brass
When he ran through the heather
His balls clanged together
And lightning shot out of his butt