MB3 - R4 - Chimpanfreak vs Octdolphig vs Shockodile

[normsherman]

The trilogy of trilogies is complete with round 4, the last of the "normal" rounds. One more hideous meta-beast will be born of a lucky(?) Skirmish round survivor. The top vote-getter on mega-beasts.com after Sunday November 22nd (Midnight, Pacific) will have its chance for ultimate glory.

Time to put the 'just because' in just-be-casualties.

[zZzacha]

Wooooo!!! And we're off again...

An awesome fourth round, bringing the alien Octdolphig! I love him already, so I know he's going to loose. Eh

Octdolphig is so cool, he can sit ink (sic)! And besides being a bad-ass ink-sitter he can also slap you silly (a trait I adore) and he can do tricks! Come on, nobody can beat that.

One question: Octdolphig can walk on his tentacles. Will that make him taller than Chimpanfreak's 6'8"? Or will he be extra vulnerable: if he walks over mister Freak and the Freak beats that weapon of his in Octdolphig's stomache? That would be nasty.
Of course, it'd be easy to walk over Shockodile, because his tiny arms prevent him from doing anything. Shockodile can of course bite off a tentacle, but if we don't tell him that is possible, he will never figure it out. He is dumb!

Also, I want to know more about the tricks. Can he make red handkerchiefs come out of his tentacles?

[normsherman]

I love Octdolphig's origin story the most of any so far.

[Phenopath]

There are two nasty mega-beasts in this round. The cruel reptile versus the savage ape.

I am a Chimpanfreak fan. It is the deranged brutality of this abused ex-science experiment that makes him a killing machine. When the red mist decends this animal just wants to destroy.

On the other hand Shockodile is force of nature.

What happens when Chimpanfreak tries his hands at gator wrestling? Electroconvulsive therapy is what. It is nothing that Chimpanfreak has not had before... there is a reason why this bad boy is madder than a box of frogs.

Octodolphig is just bacon flavoured sushi.

[StalinSays]

This is going to be an interesting round; of all the Skirmish seeded brackets I was most curious to see how fans would react to round 4. Chimpanfreak had the most Skirmish votes of any competitor, and he's fighting the weakest competition votes-wise as a result. You'd think that he would roll and make the favorites 3 for 3. But that's from a purely voter centric perspective.

Looking at this fight in real terms - Shockodile wins easily. Both Octdolphig and Chimpanfreak need close proximity and bludgeoning blows to get the job done. Shockodile is at his best fighting close, and acting defensively. If Octdolphig raps a tentacle and tries to choke him out --- zzzzzaaappppp --- if Chimpanfreak hops on his back and starts hammering him with his simple tools --- zzzzzaaapppp --- . They bite off their tongues, then Shockodile bites off their heads.

The biggest factor to his disadvantage - he's dumb; a beast against battlers. No one in R4 is the Velasquez level combat savant, but it's pretty much Harvard vs. special ed as it pertains to poor Shocky.

[StalinSays]

Electroconvulsive therapy is what. It is nothing that Chimpanfreak has not had before... there is a reason why this bad boy is madder than a box of frogs.

Hmmm.. you have a point.

Here I though Octdolphig would be the Gargantula stand-in - now I worry he is a poor, doomed Unicorpse.

[normsherman]

Hey Bo, is your buddy gonna make the megabeasts on Spore again? I wanna see how he handles Octolphig if so, hehe.

[tbaker2500]

Ok, I know that Octolphig should lose, but CMON! He's too cool to not vote for. I'm afraid I have to abandon all combat logic and vote for this dude. Very funny backstory.

[strawman]

Very funny backstory, true. But his creators are the self-admitted laughingstock of aliendom, and diacritical syntactic analysis reveals a close kinship with the author of the Nigerian Scam Spam. To put it bluntly: He has NissanHonda for brains. Contrast this with Ye Olde mad scientist freak dressed in a monkey suit. In this elemental battle of earth, sea and sky, Chimpanfreak is the Kong of the Jungle.

[drabblebabbler]

I've said it once and i'll say it again I've got a big fat megabeast crush on Chimpanfreak. Octdolphig looks like a big mix-matched mess, poor thing i can't imagine he get around very well. I mean you we've taken three animals that can do little harm alone and combined them to have even weaker attributes. I know i'm stirring the pot but I had to speak my case. Chimpanfreak's intelligence and agility clearly reigns him as the king of the megabeast corpse mountain.

[StalinSays]

Hey Bo, is your buddy gonna make the megabeasts on Spore again? I wanna see how he handles Octolphig if so, hehe.

I talked to Matt, and he seems interested in once again bringing the finalists in to the third dimension. So look forward to *as of yet unnamed plated hell cat,* P.A.I.N.G.U.I.N., and (let's just go ahead and assume) Octdolphigodileanfreak.

[StalinSays]

*as of yet unnamed plated hell cat*

Actually, that written, I kinda like Hellcat. Seem appropriate considering the mouth blasts and armoring.

Am I right? -> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/M18_Hellcat

I've said it once and i'll say it again I've got a big fat megabeast crush on Chimpanfreak.

But will you still love him when he has scales, tentacles, and a pig snout? Maybe what's best for your relationship is the ole' eternal beauty freeze. Something a painless, heart-stopping shock or asphyxiation via tentacle could provide. Just sayin'

[gord42]

...(let's just go ahead and assume) Octdolphigodileanfreak.

Dude, I am gonna vote for that genetic train wreck just to see that name in the next round!

Seriously, I am having a heck of a time deciding which way to go on this. I didn't think the ele-gator had much of a chance, but he is the only ranged weapon dealer in the round. Octopig doesn't seem really dangerous, but there's something undeniably creepy about that genetic omlette.

I gotta say I'm leaning towards the Monkeyman. The primal rage of, well, a primate! Furry, ferocious and fried-eggs-for-brains. And besides, who doesn't want to see a mega-monster who slings poo at his enemies! (You know you want one in your stocking for Christmas!)

I've talked myself into it. I'm backing the grape ape.

[gord42]

How do I put an image in this message?

Anyways, it would look somehing like this
(See StalinSays post below)

ShockerCrock is more brutal than the Chimp and Octdolphigin, and he's the only one with built-in-range weaponry.
Chimpanfreak is smarter than his competitors and has good agility, although not better than Octodogopigo.
Octdigapig on the other hand has better endurance than the others and not-insiginifanct intangibles AND . Also agility to match(but not outdo) Chimpanfreak.

Owning three different stat categories: Octothingy.

Purely from a numbers perspective, Octdolphinigun has the edge, with a total stat score of 36 over Chimpanfreaky's 34 and Shocker's measly 27. (This scoring does not assign a weighting to any of the catagories).

Despite the numerical "proof" of Octiphinegun's superiority, I still think he'll be beaten down by the Kong. Maybe I'd rather cheer for a potential ancestor than for an alien experiment.

Speaking of alien experiments, is it too early to whip out a rectal-probe joke? Maybe it is.

[StalinSays]

^
|

Gord's Graph

[tbaker2500]

Octodolphig has no clear weapon, let alone a way of winning the fight. But he is winning the popular vote. Heck, I'm voting for him.

I guess that's another case for imperialism.

[jonathancg]

Thanks for the compliments on the origins, fellas. I honestly thought any culture screwed up enough to make OctDolphig would be, uh -- unusual.

[confusedgreen]

dude dolphin octopus gives me the most nightmares. he wins

[normsherman]

Holy mother. people, where did your fear and respect of crocodiles go?! This is such an obvious Shockodile win! Sure, we'd all love for Octdolphig to be real and send us rainbows and answer our prayers at night, but this is a frikkin deathmatch for god's sake!!
Let it be known, I will not let Shockodile go down in this round, I'll play dirty if I have to. Look inside your hearts.

[strawman]

Norm, while you're goosing Shockadile, Chimpanfreak is producing #137. Is that what it's come down to, huh?