Favorite Normisms

[moonowl]

I still like "Another lonely night" lyric:

"A deathworm tramp stamp right above my booty crack"

If Norm doesn't have a MDW tramp stamp tattoo I must now insist he gets one.

[dreamrock]

Clearly I'm a bit behind, but the first three here are from two episodes ago I think? What Fluffy Knew. I didn't keep real good track of the ones after that, but if you're curious, you should probably just relisten to all the episodes. Again if you're me.

"All women writers, all month. All stories about aliens. You're going to like it, trust me. And if you don't like it, you sir, can go make me a sandwich."

"'Canada has the best hockey team in the world!' And that's a statement, not a fact."

"You know, it does seem that women are underrepresented a lot in speculative fiction still. Which is bizarre considering that women are approximately 60% better at effectively expressing themes and ideas in written form than men are. And that's a statement, not a fact."

"Do you enjoy the show? Do you want to contribute to our planetary conquest? Then donate to us, people."

"Obama will give you 8,000 dollars and the Mayans will give us all 'till 2013 if you just go subscribe now."

[dreamrock]

"I'll make sure that next time we label an episode 'explicit,' that mess'll get you pregnant." DC 122 The Fallen and the Muse of the Street, ~32 minutes.

"Without Eve, Adam never would have been able to experience the joys of fruit ... and shame." - Uh, not sure. A few weeks before May 6, 2010 though.

"Some bridges are just The Dude. And The Dude abides." -DC 162

[Beth Peters]

Regarding the Dutch:

"They don't have skeletons in the closet there. Hell, they don't even have closets. I mean, what's the point? They don't even wear clothes. No need. They don't even wear skin.
Just a bunch of skeletons...runnin' free in the open."

"Never in our entire history have there been fewer things trying to eat us than today. I think that's an important point that we tend to take for granted."

[Beth Peters]

"Some bridges are just The Dude. And The Dude abides." -DC 162

Oh ya, that had me grinning. Started with something like "not all bridges must be burnt or crossed..."
mmm, makes me want a white russian...

[edgemsTus]

[harper]

From 174, "Mankind's passionate yearning to fly can be traced all the way back to the very first person to fall to their death from some place high."

118,regarding giant jellyfish taking over the ocean "There's just 1%... a thin, almost transparent layer of gelatinous goo that stands between our oceans being hijacked and ruined, and our oceans being...pretty much just water again."

113, "Remember boys and girls, if you hear old St. Nick tip toeing downstairs tonight delivering your sack full of presents, don't get out of bed. Just sleep tight and wait till morning with dreams of sugar plums in your head. Because while chances are that it is Santa Claus, there is a small chance that it's a serial rapist. It could always be a serial rapist...never forget that."

And I crack up any time Norm gets religious and references the glorious winged mexican with the silver boomerang.

[StalinSays]

From 174, "Mankind's passionate yearning to fly can be traced all the way back to the very first person to fall to their death from some place high."

118,regarding giant jellyfish taking over the ocean "There's just 1%... a thin, almost transparent layer of gelatinous goo that stands between our oceans being hijacked and ruined, and our oceans being...pretty much just water again."

113, "Remember boys and girls, if you hear old St. Nick tip toeing downstairs tonight delivering your sack full of presents, don't get out of bed. Just sleep tight and wait till morning with dreams of sugar plums in your head. Because while chances are that it is Santa Claus, there is a small chance that it's a serial rapist. It could always be a serial rapist...never forget that."

And I crack up any time Norm gets religious and references the glorious winged mexican with the silver boomerang.

Choice Normisms harper. I remember being thoroughly enchanted by that jellyfish line.

[Algernon Sydney is Dead]

From #217:
"Follow your gut. It always turns out to be an asshole in the end."

[ROU Killing Time]

From #217:
"Follow your gut. It always turns out to be an asshole in the end."

Unless of course you are having a colonoscopy in which case the reverse is true.

[swamp]

The first entry of 2012. This cracked me up on my way to work this morning.

"When Smokey tells us that 9 out of 10 forrest fires are caused by humans, all I hear him saying is, 'There's a bear out there somewhere that knows how to @#%&ing use matches.' Right? I mean if that last one isn't on us, not our gas stoves, our cigarette butts... Billy Joel didn't do it. Who wlse could it be? Squirrels? Please. Squirrels are idiots. They never discovered fire? They invented parkour." - DC #230

I was already laughing at the Billy Joel reference when the "parkour" line hit. Brilliant!

[strawman]

Thanks, Swamp. I had missed the parkour reference.

[tbaker2500]

Ditto. I was laughing that off, and then the imagery of squirrels flying through the air sent me over the edge.

[Beth Peters]

20% of the world's mantis population are actually atheist or agnostic.

[Beth Peters]

"All you need is love." Lennon and McCartney said that, presumably on a full stomach.

[Algernon Sydney is Dead]

Via Twitter:

Planking, or what those in the yoga community call "Downward Facing Douche"

[strawman]

No matter how hard he may try, your step-ladder is not your real ladder.

[admiralsunshine]

"Remember kids: When you wish upon a star... You're about a million light years too late. That star and everything around it is dead, just like your dreams."

[Algernon Sydney is Dead]

"Remember kids: When you wish upon a star... You're about a million light years too late. That star and everything around it is dead, just like your dreams."

Unca-Norm doesn't get on base with every swing. That particular one annoyed the snot out of me because it's overly cynical and not true at all. We cannot see stars a million light-years away unless we are wishing upon a VERY expensive telescope and about to get brained by an angry research assistant.

Stars only about 10 LY out, are the ones that get the most eyeballs, and most of the "wishing" seems to be directed at one of our friendly, neighborhood planets -- with Venus, appropriately, getting the lion's share.

Gazing upon the "star" Venus
I wish to wish about my {AHEM}...

[strawman]

Wasn't this from the Clarke story about the star that had gone supernova?