MBDM 2012 R2 Cricket Bat vs Snaketopus vs Luck-Bill

[StalinSays]

Mega-Beast Death-Match 2012 - Round 2 - voting will close on Monday May 14th

Make sure to also vote on Facebook and Deviant Art if you have the chance.

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Beast 1:
Cricket Bat
Nature: Cricket, Bat, Man
Size: 6'2" (Tall) 12' (wingspan)
Weight: 800 lbs
Half-cricket, half-bat humanoid creature that walks around in an old fashioned cricket uniform with cricket bat in hand. Leaps with cricket legs, glides with bat wings. Echo-locates prey (even though he can totally see [what a dick]). Uses his cricket bat to expertly and tediously block any offensive attack over and over again like a good old fashioned test batsman would. Bores and confuses the hell out of any Mega Beasts not from a cricketing nation.

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Beast 2:
Snaketopus
Nature: Octopus/Cobra/Rattlesnake/Coral Snake
Size: 4'6" (tall) 12' (Tentacle circumfrence)
Weight: 400 pounds
The result of a botched teleportation experiment, the Snaketopus is a vicious, wriggling cepha'serpent (a truly deadly dichotomy). 8 highly venomous "snaketicles," of various flavors. Two to poison, two to paralyze, two to spit, two to dissolve flesh, not one for handshakes. Deceptively intelligent. Malleable shape. Due to the latent effects of the matter transmission ray, Snaketopus is partially out of phase with the material plane, making it an exceedingly slippery target.

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Beast 3:
Luck-Billed Platypus
Nature: Platypus
Size: 3'5" (Long) 3'5" (Tall)
Weight: 300 lbs
A diminutive, peculiar monster, with a magical nature, as perplexing to foes as the platypus is to mammalia as a whole. Lacks all but the most rudimentary physical attacks: sharp teeth, claws. Far though from harmless: can manipulate reality, in particular probability, to its advantage. Should a dive-bomb attack be heading LBP's way, oh look, it misses. Should a knife-like feather be hurdling towards its blind-side, hey well, it bounces off a rock, to return upon its thrower. A charmed fellow, to be sure.

[Mikes]

I'm torn here. Not between all three, hell no, I have not time for cricket. The fight's between Snaketopus and Luck Billed Platypus.

On the surface, Snake has all the advantages. Great attack, maleable body, poison... but we can't discount the value of luck, as Lister demonstrates here:



What makes me think twise though is the Irish imagery for LBP. There's no such thing as 'the luck of the Irish. Four centuries of foriegn rule and three famins. We may as well wax lyrical about the charm of the Germans.

[ROU Killing Time]

Point of order, re: Snaketopus. Original specs had 4 of his appendages being constrictors, boas, pythons, etc... to be the muscle balancing out the speed and venom of the other snaketicles.

Please, Don't nerf my baby... I love him as only a mad scientists, who's brain has been fused with a mass of cephaloserpentine flesh, can.

(actually you did give him some awesome venom based attacks, so I'm not crying too much, but some constriction always seemed like it was necessary for the proper, flavor, shall we say??

Final thought: In the spirit of the normal decorum inherent in the MBDM threads, I would like to say to everyone to please vote for snaketopus. Or you'll be dead to me!!!

[cinnamon]

This round, MY vote is for sale.

[ROU Killing Time]

In return for your vote, Snaketopus promises not to constrict you, while torturing and paralyzing you with multiple venomous attacks, before sucking your living brain into his beak to feed the mad brain within.

Instead he will merely constrict you to unconciousness, and mercifully consume you, only after you have first expired.

[Mikes]

Vote platypus, and perhaps you'll get 'lucky' with that hot chick from Accounts.

[ROU Killing Time]

Vote platypus, and perhaps you'll get 'lucky' with that hot chick from Accounts.

You call that lucky? She has crabs, (and I hear that they are using her as a training ground for NEXT years MBDM...)

[tbaker2500]

This is an AWESOME round! great characters, great comedy. Snaketopus is the best imagery, eight snakes trying to walk around, like a three-legged race.
I've lost my love for Cricket Bat. He's got defense, but then what. Luck-Bill can only win by accident. It's almost impossible to argue against the pros and cons of that. So I think I'm leaning towards SnakEtopus, rather than SnaKtopus as in the artwork. (Sorry Bo.)

[Mikes]

Luck-Bill can only win by accident.

Did you not see the video?

[tbaker2500]

Yes, I did.
I didn't mean he WON'T win, only that he can ONLY win by accident (luck). Therefore, hard to argue strategy for/against.

[Mikes]

Well unless one of the other two can get some form of potato-based attack going I'm thinking Bill has this nailed.

[cinnamon]

Well unless one of the other two can get some form of potato-based attack going I'm thinking Bill has this nailed.

You don't need to attack him, you just need to distract him with liquor.

[StalinSays]

The Snaktopus, he loves snacks. Wait, what beast were you talking about?

[cinnamon]

The Snaktopus, he loves snacks. Wait, what beast were you talking about?

My attempt at blatant stereotyping failed.


Anyway, his name isn't "GOOD Luck Billed Platypus". Just sayin'.

[strawman]

'Pus was born under a bad sign; been down since he begin to crawl.

[angagaur]

I propose that everyone intending to vote in this round should put Luck Bill's powers to teh test.
Flip a coin, roll dice, or find some other method of determining which megabeast you shall vote for this round. If the dice land in LBP's favor, so goes your vote. If not, feel free to vote as you choose.
IF the luck billed platypus is as lucky as we are to believe, it'll get all the votes and win!

[tbaker2500]

Except for that whole "fictional" thing, that's not a bad idea!

[Mikes]

I propose that everyone intending to vote in this round should put Luck Bill's powers to teh test.
Flip a coin...

Did it. It came up Duck.

...roll dice...

Did it. Did it three times in fact. It came up Quack, Quack, Quack. The number of the duck.

...or find some other method of determining which megabeast you shall vote for this round

I tried tarot cards and pulled out Luck Billed's business card with my address and the times my kids are in child care written on the back.

Actually, I still haven't decided who I'm voting for this round, but LBP has the most comedy potential.

[ROU Killing Time]

Comedy Schmomedy. Which one would send you screaming in terror through the night, wetting your panties.

(P.S. Awesome rendering of Snaketopus, Bo.)

[MingoZK]

The lame way this round could go is that LBP would use his powers to have lightning strike his opponents or have a tree branch fall on them or something else equally unlikely.

If we restrict his powers to the opponents only, then it could be between LBP and Snaketopus. Snaketopus could finish Cricket Bat, but then he and LBP have to fight in close quarters. Since there's no projectiles that could potentially miss in this round, LBP would have to count on all of the snake tentacles missing all the time. But being so close, I'd imagine the probability of all of the tentacles missing is zero, especially if 3 or 4 attack at once, so LBP would get bit by something eventually.

I suppose he could make it so that the tentacle that bit him would always be one of the spitting tentacles, not the more deadly ones. If the spitting tentacles are spitting blinding poison or something, I could see the spitwads always missing due to bad luck.

Hmmm, or LBP could mess with probability to have Cricket Bat defeat Snaketopus somehow. Then, Cricket Bat will just keep swinging his bat at LBP and keep missing until he tires himself out, leaving LBP to finish him off. I'm undecided as of now. I await more arguments, or possibly bribes (especially since Flamingoliath made it past his first round...)