Prelude

[StalinSays]

Ye gads, how about the murder turtle posted on reddit today?

That thing is indeed murderiffic. We used to have snappers in the pond behind my house. One bit off the tip of our collie's nose. Pappy Kaier used to take a shotgun to them if they tried to cross the yard.

We did have Hurtle on the table in 08



from
http://www.mega-beasts.com/concepts/

I'm recycling some but not all of these. The plan was a mutant sea turtle 'Terrorpin,' a la Norm's drabblenews segment. We could swap that for the fresh water variety, if that is the will of the group.

---

PS: still working on the voting mechanics. We will be having a forums only 'exhibition' death-match hopefully within the next week or so.

[Dr. Sabotage!]

I, Dr. Sabotage!, am lobbying for the Kangiru. I am in favor of these beasts starting out as portmanteaus between two preferably very different species as so contrast is strength.

Less MURDERphant, more Viperanha.

[Phenopath]

I, Dr. Sabotage!, am lobbying for the Kangiru. I am in favor of these beasts starting out as portmanteaus between two preferably very different species as so contrast is strength.

Less MURDERphant, more Viperanha.

Hmm, a head-to-head between chimera and augmented mega-beasts is the obvious way to answer this question.

[Phenopath]

One bit off the tip of our collie's nose.

Less Snapping Turtles more like Snapping Assholes.

[ROU Killing Time]

It's time we had one of our forum members incorporated into the Death Match! I hereby nominate EurethROU, who attacks by swimming upstream into twisty little passages.

Also can pull vital pieces from your innermost core then serve up your brains for dinner.
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[strawman]

CarpetsharKangiROU.
A subconscious projection with the ability to instill unsoothable fear and cause bed-wetting and furniture-jumping. You can never know when it will leap out of the carpet and burrow into your twisty little passage.

(This one might be more of a second-rounder, but bound to be a favorite bedtime story character for abusive parents.)

SqWirm
A Colossal Squid whose tentacles are each giant sea worms, whose ink is used to print the Daily Mail, which stops opponents dead in their tracks in the supermarket checkout line.

[Phenopath]

CarpetsharKangiROU.
A subconscious projection with the ability to instill unsoothable fear and cause bed-wetting and furniture-jumping. You can never know when it will leap out of the carpet and burrow into your twisty little passage.

Excellent

[ROU Killing Time]

CarpetsharKangiROU.
A subconscious projection with the ability to instill unsoothable fear and cause bed-wetting and furniture-jumping. You can never know when it will leap out of the carpet and burrow into your twisty little passage.

I'm not sure you should mess with the purity of evolutionary end-stage that is the Kangiru.

Do we really want a creature that has a scarier talent than being able to punch you in the junk while simultaneously inserting it's spiny hooks into your urethra?

(modesty prevents me from referring to it as the KangiROU, also I think that it waters down the Kangaroo/Candiru humor by taking the spotlight off the star where it belongs... but, I am flattered)
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[strawman]

That's why it may be a second-rounder, since the winner of the first round absorbs the powers of his vanquished opponents.

Which reminds me, it would be lovely to have characters derivative of Ashurbanipal and Chronos, to recreate Babylon. Would you rather be a God, to be destroyed, or a demon, to be mated with?

[StalinSays]

CarpetsharKangiROU.
A subconscious projection with the ability to instill unsoothable fear and cause bed-wetting and furniture-jumping. You can never know when it will leap out of the carpet and burrow into your twisty little passage.

I do love carpet sharks, especially because they're also referred to as 'wobbegongs' possibly the best word in the English language. But I worry for its chances; Sharkitraz is the all time worst performing beast. I will see if I can slip him in to the skirmish round, if only for the pun. Though I'm of the Kangiru camp, so I'd separate the powers out, spread the love.

(modesty prevents me from referring to it as the KangiROU, also I think that it waters down the Kangaroo/Candiru humor by taking the spotlight off the star where it belongs... but, I am flattered)

No matter what ROU, when the subject of urethral tearing is mentioned, you will be in my thoughts.

Which reminds me, it would be lovely to have characters derivative of Ashurbanipal and Chronos, to recreate Babylon. Would you rather be a God, to be destroyed, or a demon, to be mated with?

I like the idea of story send-ups. The mandatory thread in the beasts is some animal basis. That said, what kind of critter most says demon powers?

[strawman]

Ashurbryozoanipal ?
Ashurbanipal, the Giant Jellyfish ?
Help!

[Mr. Tweedy]

That said, what kind of critter most says demon powers?

Dachshund. This is surely the most evil beast in the world, and the one with the greatest power to inspire consuming hatred and madness. If you read Lovecraft's notes, Cthulhu was actually going to have the head of a dachshund, but the editors at Weird Tales made him change it because they thought the idea too horrifying.

[strawman]

Thank you Mr Tweedy, you have once again provided the spark of inspiration to the highly flammable strawman.

Although the term sausage dogs was obviously coined in the hope that a hungry person would eat the little buggers, Mrs. Strawman several years ago captured my antipathy by adopting a creature whose chief weapon is leech-like emotional dependency. I give you.... Ashurbanipoodle!

You are a demon to be mated with.

[ROU Killing Time]

No matter what ROU, when the subject of urethral tearing is mentioned, you will be in my thoughts.

Uh, Thanks. I think.


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[ruddog]

I vote for the murder turtle.

[strawman]

Behold: TERRORPIN

[jonathancg]

Yeah, after Norm's mutant sea turtle bit, it'd be a cry in shame if we don't have one somewhere in the lineup.

By the way, am I the only one getting images of Slash from the old TMNT when we mention that concept?

[Phenopath]

No matter what ROU, when the subject of urethral tearing is mentioned, you will be in my thoughts.

Uh, Thanks. I think.

It looks like you are stuck with this one mate.

[ROU Killing Time]

No matter what ROU, when the subject of urethral tearing is mentioned, you will be in my thoughts.

Uh, Thanks. I think.

It looks like you are stuck with this one mate.

Anywhere else and it might be considered an insult.

On the DC forum's, however, it must be considered to be among the highest of compliments.
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[ROU Killing Time]

Personally, I think that any mega-beast that is 1/2 Candiru, 1/2 anything else would be a creature to fear (and bet on)

Would you pet a cute little Bunniru?

Not if your smart.

What about a Koalaru, shucks I hear Koala's in their own right are deceptively nasty behind that cute stuffed bear persona they so slyly wear.

Imagine if they could logde themselves in and tear apart your, err, twisty little passage.
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