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Drabblecast 041 - Set Another Place at the Table...
Posted: Wed Dec 05, 2007 9:16 pm
Set Another Place at the Table, I'm Bringing My Pimple
by Kim McDougall
It starts off like any normal bout of Pre-Menstrual Syndrome. I'm constipated, I'm depressed and I've got a pimple the size of a hazelnut on my chin...
Art by Bo Kaier
Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2007 3:39 am
The drabble this week was inspired. My only criticism was that maybe Norm's performance was a little too "wierd voicy", but that simply served as a distraction from the fact that it wasn't real drabble, but spam as drabble. Who saw that coming?
I should have expected this from a guy who used to give gift-wrapped, canned spam to his friends for Christmas.
As a follow-up to the haiku contest, why not have a spam competition, and see who can come up with the best "email from Nigeria"? You wouldn't need to judge which one is best, just send them all out. The winner is the letter that brings in the most cash.
Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2007 3:49 am
Haha- wow, that's actually a hilarious idea. I'll run it by the crew.
As for the story, I enjoyed the suddeness with which the pimple began to take a humanoid appearance. It was like BLAM! I think we've all had a memorable cyst experience, but perhaps not viewed it so maternally.
Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2007 7:06 am
If I ever write a memoir, I think I'll have to call it "Memorable Cyst Experiences."
As for the story, I enjoyed it (I tend to enjoy gross fiction), though unlike Norm I was actually a little bit thrown, not by the pimple's sudden anthropomorphism, but by the protagonist's first reaction to this development. I found it curious, and a little unbelievable, that someone first reaction would be a maternal one that then eventually turned to revulsion. But, hormones can certainly screw you up.
Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 3:36 am
Hee hee... I listened to the last two episodes back to back. "Wow, two drabbles in a row! Awesome!" Then....
What a great visualization of spam. Just think how much money Norm could get if he actually took this route rather than asking for donations is his normal cheery voice.
On to the main story. While I enjoyed it, I had a hard time believing she skipped the fear stage and didn't call a doctor.
Then later, I got to thinking. Is this story simply a perverse cautionary tale against BJ's?
Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 3:58 am
HAHA what??? please explain...in as delicate language as possible.
Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 4:25 am
If one were to get pregnant from a BJ, I could see a sick mind writing this as a possible outcome.
Not that there are any sick minds here!
"There's a fetus in the kitchen, I ain't hungry any more..."
Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 4:32 am
Wow, you managed to somehow make this story grosser...
Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 4:38 am
Thank you, thank you! (bows)
Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 2:39 pm
I am extremely happy to have to say that your theory is impossible (thank goodness). It was stated explicitly that the narrator has been solitary for a number of weeks. "This is the most company I've had on a Saturday night in months." There's no boyfriend figure around. The pimple is of immaculate conception, which is very good because if your theory had any chance of being true I would have reformat my hard drive and get a new ISP to purge out all the grossness.
I think the more obvious implication here is that human females are actually heterogamous. Women who yearn for companionship but are unable to attract mates have evolved the ability reproduce by asexual budding. See, Drabblecast is not only gross, it teaches you about biology.
Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 7:51 pm
The statement, "Not that there are any sick minds here" immediately followed by the randomly generated "There's a fetus in my kitchen. I ain't hungry any more" leaves one to choke on an avalanche of irony.
Put the boulda down, Norm!
Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 8:03 pm
Not a randomly generated quote, but instead a specific point being made about who I was talking to.
Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 8:57 pm
Maybe the exorcist should have been called for in the story, (and for a small additional charge, stuck around for the forum).
Maybe that's where the fetus in my kitchen came from? Coulda been an exorcised pimple? One thing's for sure, Norm is someone's weird neighbor.
I believe this is what physicist Richard Feynman refers to as, "The Unified Theory of Everything".
Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 10:25 pm
You do know the fetus quote is a lyric from one of Norm's songs, right? He sings that line in front of audiences. (Truth is indeed stranger than fiction.)
Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2007 10:56 pm
Indeed...and many an awckward silence and confused expression has followed that song.
Actually Tweedy, I hadn't even thought about the biological implications of this story- thanks for that thought! Now I'm wishing the author had gone down that road more...
Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2007 5:40 am
I may be a little drunk, but I'd like to hear more about this BJ theory . . .
There has been much debate over the years as to the actual cause of acute facial sores--chocolate or grease consumption, stress, hormones, herpes--but I doubt anyone has ever tested for gamete consumption. Is it consumption that does it, in your opinion, or contact? I believe some research is in order. . .
In other news, we love the Nigerian spam contest idea, that is just brilliant. We're gonna call it, "Its not fraud if its for a non-profit flash fiction podcast"
Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2007 3:04 pm
Hmm... I think I'm going to flex my moderatorial powers here and decree that no BJ research is in order, and probably no more discussion. I don't think it's in the forum's best interests to have conversation go into X-rated bawdiness, especially not when it's brand new and trying to attract a membership.
No more about gamete consumption. Sorry.
Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2007 3:57 pm
Hey Luke, I gotta commend you on I-81. That is the only drabblecast where I didn't see the punch line coming, it was laugh out loud funny!
Fetus in the kitchen
Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2007 6:04 pm
Tweedy, that's what I meant by Norm being someone's weird neighbor:
"She had a weird neighbor who put feti in her drawers..."
Posted: Sat Dec 08, 2007 7:34 pm
No Norm plants pimple clones of himself in unsuspecting households? Like a cuckoo leaving its eggs in the nests of hapless finches?