Intervention

100 word stories. Post all you like, maybe we'll dip in and use yours?
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rowan_bristol
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Intervention

Post by rowan_bristol » Fri Jun 17, 2011 2:05 am

The envelope lay next to the razor. Elise had given him the envelope a year ago, before she’d disappeared. One day, she’d said, he would follow her on the journey. The moment it became too much, she’d said pleadingly, he had to read the message. Wiping his eyes, he cut open the envelope. A small introduction card fell out, written in her beautiful script.

“Have you considered going mad instead?”

He laughed. And the tears that fell didn’t stop the laughter. The razor dropped like a swan’s fart in his hands as the melody of Elise’s voice echoed in platinum.
"To Love is to Act."

Make No Small Plans: A blog for writing, miscellany, and the secret conspiracies of the Columbia Exposition.

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strawman
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Re: Intervention

Post by strawman » Fri Jun 17, 2011 12:29 pm

I liked this, but the simile in the last sentence leaves me curious about what a swan's fart feels like in the hand. Is that thought where you want to leave your audience?
Never judge anyone until you have biopsied their brain.

"Be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle."
Known Some Call Is Air Am
Spoiler:
Non sum qualis eram = "I am not who I will be"

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Scattercat
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Re: Intervention

Post by Scattercat » Fri Jun 17, 2011 2:03 pm

Probably pretty moist. Y'know, cloaca and all.

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rowan_bristol
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Re: Intervention

Post by rowan_bristol » Fri Jun 17, 2011 2:50 pm

and entirely unlike a razor. :)

However, note taken and accepted. I need to be better with my nonsensical terms.
"To Love is to Act."

Make No Small Plans: A blog for writing, miscellany, and the secret conspiracies of the Columbia Exposition.

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ROU Killing Time
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Re: Intervention

Post by ROU Killing Time » Wed Jun 29, 2011 3:28 am

I think you must have written this just for me, whether you knew it or not.
"Never fuck with The Culture"
Sublime In Peace Iain M. Banks.

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rowan_bristol
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Re: Intervention

Post by rowan_bristol » Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:40 pm

ROU Killing Time wrote:I think you must have written this just for me, whether you knew it or not.
I'm glad, then. :)
"To Love is to Act."

Make No Small Plans: A blog for writing, miscellany, and the secret conspiracies of the Columbia Exposition.

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