Thinning the Herd.

[Astroguyz]

…For years, they’d eagerly listened to us, hoping we’d evolve into sophistication. But the onslaught of O.J. trials and Springer reruns reached such a cacophony in the cosmic radio din that hope was swiftly fading. And then, the patience of the omnipotent and normally benevolent Watchers was finally broken. It was time to thin the galactic herd. As humanity watched the improbably large ships of the alien fleet slide over every city on the planet Earth, few would know that the continuous onslaught of Tiger Woods updates broadcast into the cosmos was the ultimate cause of the extermination of civilization…

[strawman]

Civilization was ended years ago, when the aliens started firing their Jersey Shore beam.

[Christi]

I like!
If I were a superior alien race, I would have taken us out for Bieber!


Nothing disputes civilization like Bieber Fever