little thief

100 word stories. Post all you like, maybe we'll dip in and use yours?
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Zyzyx
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little thief

Post by Zyzyx » Fri Sep 05, 2014 3:37 am

No little thief, you will not pay, I will extract. Payment is for things purchased and that which you have stolen is no longer mine to sell. Return? No little thief your actions have soiled my goods and I have no use for them. At a time and place, for a duration, by a method, and to a degree of my choosing I shall extract from, or more likely out of, you a price greater than which can be measured gold. It's too late for you to consider the consequences of your actions, but I shall do so at length.
I reserve the right to be wrong and use it frequently.

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PB&Jellyphish320
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Re: little thief

Post by PB&Jellyphish320 » Fri Sep 05, 2014 4:03 pm

Humm. This certainly does leave my curiosity wheels spinning. What did he/she steal, why is he/she trying to give it back? What could possibly be the consequences? I think it might be better if there were a bit more or a punchline.
~ What's that in the mirror, or the corner of your eyes. What's those footsteps following but never passing by . . .

~ The Doctor

montanamax
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Re: little thief

Post by montanamax » Fri Sep 05, 2014 5:37 pm

I love the mystery of not knowing the "whats" and "whys" in this piece at the 100 word mark - very moody and creates great tension. This would be a great opening for a short story to dig into those questions.

SpareInch
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Re: little thief

Post by SpareInch » Fri Sep 05, 2014 7:33 pm

PB&Jellyphish320 wrote:Humm. This certainly does leave my curiosity wheels spinning. What did he/she steal, why is he/she trying to give it back? What could possibly be the consequences? I think it might be better if there were a bit more or a punchline.

No no no no no! It's lovely as it is. Just exactly what you think when you have something stolen from you.
The truth may be out there, but lies are inside your head.

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Horrorshow
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Re: little thief

Post by Horrorshow » Sat Sep 06, 2014 12:34 pm

Got a lot out of this. Thanks, Zyzyx.

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