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Quickly! Swiftly!

Posted: Thu Oct 30, 2014 9:58 pm
by tibbi
Standing at the top of the cliff, an entire world lays before her. Greens, blues and browns swirl into the horizon. Here and there, touches of red, yellow and orange.

With no warning breeze, the wild wind whips around her. A sudden boil of storm clouds rushes across the sky.

In the valley below, lightning strikes set the forest on fire. From amongst its trees, the winged herd takes to the air, escaping the inferno. “Flee!” Each scream the word over and over as they pass by.

She listens. Turns and sprints away into as yet unburnt woods. She lives.


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Update: title changed, I'll see if I like this one better.


This is from a dream I had. They are always very vivid.

I don't really like the title. I may change it.

Re: When Staying Still Is Death

Posted: Fri Oct 31, 2014 12:56 am
by MonsieurMoustache
I enjoyed the imagery, and how a nice a little snippet it is. I must've read it five times by now trying to put it all together; but in a good way. I'm curious about the winged herd. Pegasi?

Quick spelling thing: Lightning instead of lightening.

As for title, how about "Another Day"? Just what popped into my head. I like title that can let you read the Drabble in a new way, if you can think of one.

Re: When Staying Still Is Death

Posted: Fri Oct 31, 2014 1:45 am
by tibbi
Thank you for the spelling hint. I always do that.

I'm still thinking of titles. Hope a good one comes to mind. I might go with “Another Day” if I don't think of something else.

Re: When Staying Still Is Death

Posted: Fri Oct 31, 2014 3:10 am
by tibbi
Maybe Pegasi. Maybe something else, like tiny flying buffalo. :) It's more fun to leave it to the reader's imagination.

Re: When Staying Still Is Death

Posted: Fri Oct 31, 2014 7:29 am
by unseentangerine
Ooh ooh!
"Listen to the Color of Your Dreams"?
or
"Blown On A Steel Breeze"?
or
"Because the Wind is High It Blows My Mind"?

I like naming stories after already meaningful phrases like song lyrics or idioms because it makes the title carry a whole other cloud of imagination. IMHO