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Last Rites

Posted: Sat Jul 13, 2019 9:31 am
by rowan_bristol
I heard the clack of the Devil’s white shoes over the sounds of my heart monitor.

“Have you come for my soul at last?” I wheezed through the mask.

The Devil walked to my side. “I took your soul years and years ago when we made the contract. It’s long gone, fed to creditors in dimensions where hunger is the only rule. You’ve lived without one nearly all your life. There is no eternity for you.”

“If it’s already gone, then why –“ I coughed my last in agony as The Devil grinned.

“I’m just here to watch you die.”

Re: Last Rites

Posted: Sun Jul 21, 2019 5:01 pm
by WeaselMaster
Oooh. Nice one. Brutal.

Re: Last Rites

Posted: Wed Aug 21, 2019 9:52 pm
by Ichabod
I like this one also. Nice cynical in-your-face at the end.

Re: Last Rites

Posted: Thu Aug 22, 2019 8:28 pm
by MonsieurMoustache
I liked the early part where the soul was fed to creditors. Felt that was going somewhere interesting. The end is good, but there's something about 'you lived without a soul for years and never noticed' that I find intriguing.