Finally, California falls into the sea

100 word stories. Post all you like, maybe we'll dip in and use yours?
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juliasd
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Finally, California falls into the sea

Post by juliasd » Thu Dec 03, 2009 2:52 am

Waves crash over front lawns as the earth rumbles. Houses fall into the San Andres Fault and cars sink to the ocean floor. Freeways collapse into the roiling sea. The LA river breaks its cement cage to rush over backyards and early morning joggers.

After the earthquake, the tide ebbs and flows over broken sidewalks, murky water concealing devastation. Surviving schools open, two-bit actors are quoted – saying they are thankful they couldn’t afford to live in Hollywood. People try to fish their lives out of the Pacific.

Gentle waves lap at my porch. I smile. I’ve always wanted beachfront property.

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strawman
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Re: Finally, California falls into the sea

Post by strawman » Thu Dec 03, 2009 3:07 am

Unfortunately the state's debt now has to be paid by the 10% of the population that survived, and your government-provided FEMA trailer on your .2 acre lot in Needles overlooking the Pacific now is tax appraised at $6.3 billion.
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juliasd
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Re: Finally, California falls into the sea

Post by juliasd » Thu Dec 03, 2009 3:18 am

strawman wrote:Unfortunately the state's debt now has to be paid by the 10% of the population that survived, and your government-provided FEMA trailer on your .2 acre lot in Needles overlooking the Pacific now is tax appraised at $6.3 billion.
Hey, the Governator can just sell some FEMA trailers and pay the state debt! He seems to be into selling crap for the state, so it might work out. Thanks for the solution to my poor state's crisis, Strawman. Now, how to implement it...

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Algernon Sydney is Dead
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Re: Finally, California falls into the sea

Post by Algernon Sydney is Dead » Thu Dec 03, 2009 4:00 am

juliasd wrote:Gentle waves lap at my porch. I smile. I’ve always wanted beachfront property.
The California Coastal Commission has condemned your shack. It is needed for seal lion resting grounds.
The rest of your property is to be a public access easement, which means that your parcel will now be taxed at $10Million. You do NOT have a permit for that FEMA trailer, nor will you be granted a septic permit (sewer system was destroyed.)

juliasd
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Re: Finally, California falls into the sea

Post by juliasd » Thu Dec 03, 2009 4:12 am

Algernon Sydney is Dead wrote:
juliasd wrote:Gentle waves lap at my porch. I smile. I’ve always wanted beachfront property.
The California Coastal Commission has condemned your shack. It is needed for seal lion resting grounds.
The rest of your property is to be a public access easement, which means that your parcel will now be taxed at $10Million. You do NOT have a permit for that FEMA trailer, nor will you be granted a septic permit (sewer system was destroyed.)
Damn you, California Coastal Commission! Your evil has no bounds! Though... I do like sea lions.

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ROU Killing Time
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Re: Finally, California falls into the sea

Post by ROU Killing Time » Thu Dec 03, 2009 6:06 am

All local California politics aside (hopefully they were all in Sacramento when it slid off) I really like the drabble and the way the events lead up to the punchline.

I'm reminded a bit of the feeling at the end of the short story "A Slight Miscalculation" which is a wonderful San Andreas fault-line story. :-)
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juliasd
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Re: Finally, California falls into the sea

Post by juliasd » Thu Dec 03, 2009 6:21 am

ROU Killing Time wrote:I really like the drabble and the way the events lead up to the punchline.

I'm reminded a bit of the feeling at the end of the short story "A Slight Miscalculation" which is a wonderful San Andreas fault-line story. :-)
Thanks so much ROU! I have to say, I've been waiting for beach front property for a while now, but the earthquakes we've had so far have been extremely ill-tempered and uncooperative.

I'll have to find "A Slight Miscalculation". I like earthquake stories. 8)

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