Barbara Robson

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Barbara Robson

Post by normsherman » Sat Jul 11, 2009 11:22 pm

Most Esteemed Lady,

I have recently come into possession of six large bales of golden wool, shorn with great care from the unique winged ram known as Chrysomallos. Although the wool belongs to me, the rightful purchaser from its original owner,Jason of Thessaly (a man of impeccable standing), it is currently subject to vexatious dispute in the courts of Nigeria, being claimed also by one Phrixus of Colchis.

My lawyer has recommended to me that the fleece should be stored safely in another country until the dispute is settled in our favour. Sadly, I do not have any good friend outside of Nigeria who can help me in this. You have been recommended to me as a woman of high reputation, in whose safe hands I can trust the valuable golden wool, so I turn to you for help. If you will store the wool, currently valued at $US 5.7M on the open market, in a safe place in a safe place for three nights, you may keep one of the six bales in recompense, to do with as you wish.

My lawyer advises that to secure this transaction, it will be necessary to complete certain paperwork on both sides. This, I have attached. There is no need to read the details. Do not be alarmed: although it makes some mention of your first-born child, this is merely part of the standard form for such contracts. Clearly, as a maiden, this can be of no possible relevance to you. Your signature on the last page and initials on each of the preceding pages is all that is required for this most profitable venture.

Yours honourably,

Rumplest... ahem
John Doe,
"Give us all some Jelly"