Junior's First Word

ROU Killing Time · Post by **ROU Killing Time** » Mon Jul 13, 2009 10:54 am

I think every parent has felt the worry that comes when a child is slow to start talking.

So it was with Edgar and Maisey Pickleton.

Their friends assured them that, all things considered, a slight delay might be considered natural.

Still, that didn't salve the angst in their hearts.

Then came that one happy day when Maisey could barely contain her excitement waiting for her husband to return home so she could give him the news.

As Edgar staggered through the door, he saw the happiness in his wifes maggot infested eyes as she proudly proclaimed: Johnny said "Brains!"

strawman · Post by **strawman** » Mon Jul 13, 2009 12:46 pm

I guess it's possible that Zombies can talk after all, which means they can star in their own sitcom (Kathy Griffin doesn't count).

Mr. Tweedy · Post by **Mr. Tweedy** » Mon Jul 13, 2009 2:36 pm

Hmm... Cute, but could zombies have a baby? Since they're rotting and all...

I think good zombie fiction is always realistic.

strawman · Post by **strawman** » Mon Jul 13, 2009 5:26 pm

Mr. Tweedy wrote:I think good zombie fiction is always realistic.

This sentence can be reconstructed in any order and still be true.
"Good zombies is I think always realistic fiction", is probably better zombie syntax. The best Zombie poets scramble all the letters in the same way, giving special emphasis to pointless vowel interjections.

UndeadRUs

ROU Killing Time · Post by **ROU Killing Time** » Mon Jul 13, 2009 6:02 pm

Mr. Tweedy wrote:Hmm... Cute, but could zombies have a baby? Since they're rotting and all...

I think good zombie fiction is always realistic.

So the family all became zombies after the kid was born.

That's a no-brainer...

ROU Killing Time · Post by **ROU Killing Time** » Mon Jul 13, 2009 6:38 pm

strawman wrote:I guess it's possible that Zombies can talk after all, which means they can star in their own sitcom (Kathy Griffin doesn't count).

Zombie elocution is handled differently in the genre. Are we talking George Romero zombies? They can barely shuffle and moan let alone make an advanced plea for "more brains."

I guess the other major faction in the Zombie genre generation game is the "Return of the Living Dead" spoof series with the very verbal and highly athletic breed of zombies. Shucks, you could have an entertaining and competitive 50 yard dash event with some of those zombies, they are so fit.

I grew up with the Romero zombies. (I still have trouble with shopping malls) but I have to say, when using zombies in a written setting, allowing for speech ala "Return of the Living Dead" does open quite a few more possibilities.

Mr. Tweedy · Post by **Mr. Tweedy** » Mon Jul 13, 2009 11:13 pm

I've had this idea of a spoof news interview where Katie Couric (or an equivalent) interviews a spokesman for a zombie rights organization. The spokesman is your typical rotting, oozing, festering undead, but he's very animated and eloquent. The interview goes on for about 2 minutes with the zombie waxing poetic about the contribution of zombies to society, anti-zombie discrimination, how zombies are misunderstood, etc. Couric is 100% sympathetic, going so far as to express her hope that new age of tolerance and empathy between humans and zombies is near at hand.

The interview ends with Katie and zombie giving each other a warm, familial embrace. The zombie rips her head off in a explosion of blood and begins to messily eat her face.

Screen cuts to the CBS News logo, followed by the usual ads for Viagra, Lipitor and Prilosec. When the news comes back on, there is a new anchor in place of Katie. The new guy continues with the news as thought nothing had happened. The set, however, is covered in gore, which remains until the end of the show.

ROU Killing Time · Post by **ROU Killing Time** » Tue Jul 14, 2009 3:17 am

Mr. Tweedy wrote:I've had this idea of a spoof news interview where Katie Couric (or an equivalent) interviews a spokesman for a zombie rights organization. The spokesman is your typical rotting, oozing, festering undead, but he's very animated and eloquent. The interview goes on for about 2 minutes with the zombie waxing poetic about the contribution of zombies to society, anti-zombie discrimination, how zombies are misunderstood, etc. Couric is 100% sympathetic, going so far as to express her hope that new age of tolerance and empathy between humans and zombies is near at hand.

The interview ends with Katie and zombie giving each other a warm, familial embrace. The zombie rips her head off in a explosion of blood and begins to messily eat her face.

Screen cuts to the CBS News logo, followed by the usual ads for Viagra, Lipitor and Prilosec. When the news comes back on, there is a new anchor in place of Katie. The new guy continues with the news as thought nothing had happened. The set, however, is covered in gore, which remains until the end of the show.

Well, you need to trim that a bit to get to 100 words, but otherwise, I'm there.

The Drabblecast Forums

Junior's First Word

Hit or Miss

Junior's First Word